Throughout the years that I have been a marching chief, I have read bunches of articles about how much better chiefs was when other people were gunkies. Well here's my list of how things were different when I was a gunkie:

1) When i was a gunkie we were allowed to drink as much as we wanted, wherever we wanted, and whenever we wanted!

- Because of this all ten busses had to wait for 2 hours at the Ofahumka service station while a 19 year old girl layed on the ground having convultions because she had been drinking while on medication. She was taken to a local hospital where her parents had to pick her up.

-Because of this the senior charge was given 100 proof and with every expetive possible, all in fron of Mr. Sheldon,  Dr. Shellahamer, Dr. Croft, and Provost Glidden. This person was kicked out of chiefs and missed his last bowl game.

- Because of this, some people got so drunk on the busses going to away games that we never were 100% for a performance, and like it or not we lost some half-time shows (Penn State).

2) When I was a gunkie we got to go to the Blockbuster Bowl!!!
At the Blockbuster Bowl we got sick on a cruise and had the pleasure of sharing the field with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. We were stuck on the field while they danced around us. If you thought the halftime show at New Jersey was bad, at least we didn't have to stand on the field while the worst George Bush imepersonator ever talked on the loudspeaker for 20 minutes. And we didn't get to walk around New York for a night!

3) The Chieftain was so vulgar that even the saxes were offended. Well not really, but it did get really bad.

4) when I was a gunkie we performed some great shows! Like the cartoon show!!! In fact we liked it so much we performed it at every away game AND at two home games. Even our fans were asking when we were going to learn a new show.

- We also did the Les Miserables show. Great music, great drill. But wait! We're missing 200 counts....on Friday! I've got an idea! Why don't half the people mark time in normal 6/8 while the rest of the band runs at six steps a measure to their spots. You thought the German composers show was bad? That was nothing. At least for the German composers show, there was a crowd response. We didn't even get our usual obligatory applause from the Les Mis show. The crowd knew it and Chiefs knew it. The show was not just below Chief's standards, it was  embarrassing.

Gunkies: You are very fortunate to have come to the Marching Chiefs at one of the best times. We have had consistently good shows, good crowd responce, and most of all we are playing for the national championship. There has been alot of fighting, changing, complaining, arguing, complaining, and more complaining over the past four years that has brought Chiefs to were it is today. It is up to you to make sure that the Marching Chiefs never again lose a halftime show. And that you uphold the standards that have been set by this year's Marching Chiefs. Marching Chiefs all the damn time!